so 2 years later I feel the exact same, I’m on medication now and I feel the same. The family situation is the same, the subtle and sometimes not so subtle abuse is the same. Im 22 too and have never lived away from them (they still get siblings to ‘babysit’ me when their in pak), never had a proper non part time job in the field i want and have never been in a relationship.
It’s been so long I wonder if theres any point in trying anymore. My mental state is getting worse and the close friends I did have for a couple of months..we arent in much contact anymore. It feels impossible to leave, they infantilise me to the point of embarrassment even if it’s a joke, yet want to me grow up get a job while cooking/cleaning and looking after/doting on my parents for my entire life until they pass away (Astagfirullah). And the hardest part is the constant berating and trying to take my meds away from me. I’m not in control of my own body, how I look, how I act, how I dress, who I talk to, where I go or what I eat.
And I can’t even stay mad because it takes too much emotional energy from me, all I do is cry. Dads nice to me and in my heart I want to forgive him for what he did. For mum I think after all these years of it there will always be a hatred for her deep down no matter how minute. I don’t like to be around any of them.
I have to remind myself even if everything was always fine It isn’t a horrendous act for me to want to move out. It will come with a lot of fighting but it’s not in the wrong. I can’t waste my life here pretending every day. How long can I hide my art? my interests? my sexuality? it can’t last forever. Everyday I hate my nose, my face and my body with the weight I’ve gained more and more. I want to be loved by someone but the fear it so ridiculously numbing I back out and can’t reply to anyone. I constantly blame myself and feel anyone hates me. I can’t even do the final step in applying for therapy because everyone’s always snooping, there is nowhere to talk the truth. I don’t know how long I can hold on for or if I will even make it to 23, I really can’t see any future for me, I’ve long forgotten any big dreams I had in the past. I just want to sleep and never wake up. I’ll have to see how it goes…

